A CAT A FREAKING CAT GETS A STAR ON THE HOLLYWOOD WALK OF FAME AND I’M SITTING HERE WORKING MY BUTT OFF TRYING TO GET THROUGH COLLEGE AND MAKE A STANDARD LIVING AND THIS CAT MAKES A FROWNY FACE AT A CAMERA AND GETS A FRICKING HOLLYWOOD STAR NOPE NO I DID NOT SIGN UP FOR THAT
motherfucker what is this shit, sand? fuck sand. i hate sand. thanks, mom. thanks for absolutely nothing, leaving me here on this fucking beach, is that a fucking seagull? oh my god, mom, you suck more than anything has ever sucked. i’m getting to that ocean just so i can urinate on your carapace. i’m gonna urinate on it so hard. fucking sand. i think five of my brothers just got eaten. good, i hated those assholes. i’m coming, mom. you’ve got blood on your flippers, bitch.